WAAS Bylaws

Article 1: Purpose

The purpose of these By-laws is to establish a governing structure for the Wedge Antilles Admiration Society (hereinafter referred to as "the Society" or "WAAS") in accordance with the wishes of the Members of the Society.

Article 2: Governing Structure

B: Operations

The operation of the Society shall be directed by all its members, irregardless of status or length of membership, in accordance with the provisions of these By-laws. If any problems arise that requires the attention and participation of all member of the Society, said members must make their opinions known. Failure to do so indicates lack of interest in the subject at hand and immediately voids your right to complain later. Exeption: any member who joins the Society after an issue has been resolved reserves the right to bring it up again, until it has been explained and/or resolved in a satisfactory manner

Article 3: Titles

Any member of the Society may nominate another member for a title. Titles held at time of this writing:

A: WAAS Resident Goddess of Translation and Glitter: Glimmer Girl
1. Responsibilities: In charge of Latin and sprinkling the pilots with glitter dust, and, if possible, getting them into leather pants. Priestess of the Temple of Wedge.
2. Rights: Libations and temple servants who lounge around in drawstring sleep pants.

B: Most Exalted Spoofer of Python: Elizabeth
1. Responsibilities: Final Authority on all things Python, resident Doctor of Humor, Keeper of the Birthday list.
2. Rights: Frequent "inspirational" visits from the pilot(s) of her choice.

C: Supreme SmutSlut: Antigone
1. Responsibilities: OT posting, smut, and general mayhem.
2. Rights: Janson in a thong, Hobbie in an artfully draped sheet.

D: CloneQueen: Ili
1. Responsibilities: Creating clones for the use and misuse of all Society members.
2. Rights: Modeling (coughcough) on demand by the pilots of her choice.

E: SweetSmut Writer: Katrielle
1.Responsibilities: Adorable, "Awwwww..."-able fic
2. Rights: Gavin. More Gavin. 24-hour Gavin. And the adoration of Society members for being such a cutie.

F: Most Prolific Ho!Downer and Grand High Packrat: Claire
1. Responsibilities: Ho!Downs on command, pulling back posts from her magic hat
2. Rights: Comlink numbers of all pilots for spontaneous prankings, collar made specifically to fit the Face

Article 4: Quorums

A quorum, for the purposes of WAASchat (time and date to be decided later) is: bigger than 1 and smaller than a breadbox.

Article 5: Membership

Any person with an obsessive interest in Wedge or any other member of Rogue or Wraith Squadron may join the Society, irregardless of species, race, creed, sexual or political orientation, or religious beliefs. However, we’re a naughty bunch and minors or men might be offended or scared by our frank discussions of sexuality and Jell-O.

Article 6: Voting Rights

All members have the right to vote on issues pertaining to the Society.

Article 7: Activities

The activities of this Society are as follows:

A. Wedge-worship

B. Smut

C. Random Pilot-worship

D. OT posting

E. Smut

F. Bitching about stuff

G. Snorking at Elizabeth’s latest Python parody

H. Smut

I. Abject amounts of hatred for Borsk Fey’lya, KJA (hereinafter referred to as "nastyman") and his characters

J. Envisioning nekkid pilots

K. Smut

Article 8: Ratification

All decisions pertaining to the welfare of the Society have to be ratified at a special bi-weekly meeting--
Wedge: Um...
By a simple majority in the case of purely internal affairs,--
Wedge: Um... Anti?
But by a two-thirds majority in the case of more major--
Wedge: Anti! Wrong movie!
Wedge: And you’re supposed to leave that stuff to Elizabeth. Sheesh.

Article 9: Declarations of War

All Society members must maintain a constant state of watchfulness against the encroachments of:

A. Nastyman

1. Because he writes our Hero completely out of character and makes him look like a bumbling idiot who falls for any chick with blue skin and a sob story.

2. Because, all Wedge issues aside, he sucks.

Open war will be declared against this woogalar if he ever attempts to publish another Wedge-bashing book again.

B. Borsk Fey’lya

1. Because he treats our Hero and all other pilots like dirt.

2. Because he’s a sneaky, conniving little furball.

3. Because he sucks.

Article 10: Objects of Derision

A. Corran Horn. Although some society members may actually like this pilot, other members have expressed their deep-seated contempt for this short little daddy’s boy.

1. Because he was mean to Tycho.

2. Because he has a huge ego and no excuse for it.

3. Because he was mean to Tycho.

B. Qwi Xux

1. Because she couldn’t figure out that a “Death Star” might actually be a bad thing.

2. Because she turned our Hero into a love-besotted wimp.

3. Because she would, if given the chance, have been mean to Tycho.

C. Luke Skywalker AKA Farmboy

1. Because he whines.

2. Because he takes all the credit for Wedge’s wonderful doings.

3. Because, even though he has never been mean to Tycho, he might be someday.

Article 11: Freedom of speech

WAAS shall make no law disallowing adult fanfiction, or prohibiting the free exercise of ‘fic writing; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of smut; or the right of the people peaceably to lust, and to petition the Society’s writers for specific pairings.

A. All ‘fics must include at least one appearance by Wedge or any other Rogue or Wraith. This includes the Farmboy, as he was once a member of the greatest fighter squadron ever, before he scampered off to be a wussy Jedi.

B. All ‘fics must be preceded by a header that includes the following information:

1. Title- The title of the piece.

2. Author- The name under which the fic will be archived. "Me" isn't good enough. (unless s/he wishes to remain anonymous, in which case we’ll find out who they are and taunt them).

3. Rating: MPAA ratings or equivalent (G- as if!, PG, PG-13, R, NC-17-yeah baby!).

4. Disclaimers: Because none of us are George Lucas.

5. Summary: A brief idea of what it’s about, so we know whether or not to ignore it.

6. Warnings: Spoilers for the novels, warnings about specific activities that some list members may find offensive. Well, not our current list members, since we all seem to be open-minded hos. This includes slash, chan, bestiality, rape, BDSM, eyeballs, Hutt-love, etc...

7. Archive: If you don't tell us not to, we will.

C. Fics posted without a header will not be archived.

Article 12: Tyranny

If our Fearless Leader at any time becomes an insufferable tyrant, Tycho Celchu or Wedge Antilles (or both), depending upon who's available, should be immediately dispatched to remedy the situation. If neither is available, uttering the name "Master Shark" should snap her out of it.

Article 13: Morale

Any WAASer caught using the phrase "my fic sucks" or similar sentiments must compose a hoe-down. The offender shall be called out on-list and the subject matter of the hoe-down will be assigned by the person doing the calling-out. The offender then has 24 hours to compose a hoe-down but she/he cannot post anything else until the hoe-down is written. It doesn't matter how stupid or silly the hoe-down is; the point is to promote positivity and warm fuzzy feelings. *

Article 14: Official Hos

Anyone who has completed (or has in progress, in the case of multiple parts), any Wedge Antilles smut (het/slash/whatever) shall be granted the title "General Antilles' Ho" and may post their title on their website, in their siggie, or anywhere they deem fit.*

Article 15: Crime and Punishment

A. Crimes

1. All posts must contain something random and OT. Failure to observe this law will result in the application of Punishment One.

2. Wedge-hating: Defined as any act in which one derides our Hero. Exceptions: anyone who mentions Qwi Xux may lawfully (and truthfully) state that Wedge was an idiot to knock boots with her. Failure to observe this law will result in the application of Punishment Two.

3. Flames.

a. Defined as "Rude and ignorant lambasting of a person or post, including fanfics, usually perpetrated by those too stupid to write anything of their own or to make any sort of intelligent comment."

b. WAAS has a zero tolerance on flames. Failure to observe this law will result in the application of Punishment Three.

4. All posts must contain the words "Antigone is the Supreme SmutSlut and I bow to her genius." Failure to observe this law will result in the application of Punishment Two.

B. Punishments

1. Immediate and irreversible exile to Fic-land, where the fountains flow with Whyren's Reserve and the pilots lounge about in togas and loincloths.

2. Immediate imprisonment in Azkaban, where the dementors will suck your will to live and force you to read KJA. Muaahahahaha.

3. Death. Plus, we won’t like you any more.

4. Aforementioned punishments are meant to be a *deterrant* to rule-breaking. Therefore, a judiciary board will be set up to try those WAASers who seem entirely too eager to be punished. Those found guilty will be deemed Repeat Offenders.

Repeat Offenders will be sentenced to a period of no less than 36 hours in the company of one Borsk Fey'lya. However, should that person, hypothetically and purely by accident (preferably a very messy, humiliating accident), perhaps kill one Borsk Fey’lya, then that person (whomever she may be) would immediately be proclaimed WAASheroine and would be entitled to the Rogue/Wraith(s) of her choice. In the attire of her choice. With condiments of her choice.

Article 16: List Etiquette
Thou shalt snip thy messages, else face the torment of the listmod doing her best Kyp Durron impression.

Article 17: Official Slogan

X-Wing pilot: The gift that keeps on giving. ~ Varghona

Article 18: Official Poem

Better than the brazen giant of Greek fame,
With conquering limbs astride from land to land;
Here at our Whyren’s Reserve-washed, sunset gates shall stand
Mighty women with torches, whose flame
Is the fires of lust, and their names
Goddesses of WAAS. From their beacon-hands
Glows world-wide welcome; their sparkling eyes command
The X-Wing hangar that the galaxy adores.
"Keep, judgmental site-lords, your bloated pomp!" cries she
With silent lips. "Give me your naughty, your persecuted,
Your smut-minded masses yearning to write free,*
Those thrust from RP.c, refused the shelter of your teeming shore.
Send these, the slashers, the lust-inspired to us,
We lift our lamps beside the golden door!"

- Spoof of "The New Colossus," by Emma Lazarus

Article 19: Amendments

WAAS reserves the right to amend and/or alter these bylaws in accordance with majority opinion.

* Contributed by An’Arie and quoted verbatim because there was no way to improve upon it