The Senate Prepares for the End


As all of you know by now, the galaxy will implode on November 7. Naturally, the Galactic Senate will have to take steps to ensure that the day-to-day activities of the Republic's citizens are not unduly disrupted. Our Gungan-on-the-street, Cap'n Gus, interviewed Senator Borsk Fey'lya to guage the Senate's mood at this critical time.

Times: Thankee much for lettin' us spek to yousa, Senator. Wesa muchly appreciatin' it.

Fey'lya: Oh, it's no problem at all. I'm always available to my constituents.

Times: That mighty big of yousa, sir. Anyways, wesa worried about disn big boom gonna happen inna couple weeks. What yousn Senate have planned?

Fey'lya: You must understand that the Senate, as a whole, does not acknowledge the imminent disaster. They prefer to stick their heads in the sand and ignore the possible damage to lives and property that this.. er... boom might cause. But rest assured that your Bothan senators have worked day and night to make sure that this alleged implosion will have as little effect as possible, given that it will likely destory the entire galaxy.

Times: Yeah, disn bad. What yousa recommend to our readers, bout what theysn can do?

Fey'lya: I believe that the safest thing would be to stay calm and write to your senator to demand that I be made Chief of State. I alone can save the galaxy!

Times: Um.... how yousn gonna do that?

Fey'lya: Don't question me, frog.

Times: Datn be a speciest remark. Mesa puttin dat in da paper.

Fey'lya: No, no, no. It was merely a term of endearment. "Frog" is an affectionate Bothan word.

Times: Yousa hittin on mesa?

Fey'lya: Oh, for Sith's sake. You're a frog! You're slimy and bug-eyed and you talk stupid!

Times: Disn going in da paper! Mesa tellin my Senator! Disn a free pla--GAK!

The Times would like to extend its condolences to the family of Cap'n Gus, and express its deep sorrow at his untimely demise.


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