The Coruscant Times
Where the facts don't matter
April 22, 2002

Mon Mothma Sex Scandal!

Since the collapse of Jinnron, Coruscant's largest weapons manufacturer, some Senators have accused the Chief of State of trading sex for her votes. High-level staffers have come forward to state that Jinnron CEO Quiaskqui Jinn was a very personal friend of our fearless leader.

"He spent a lot of time in the octaganol office," confirms one witness, who wishes to remain anonymous. "She let him look over her papers and help her choose appointees to the [Ministry of Military and Killing Things], and then she'd take him up to her private rooms. You can guess what happened next."

Mon Mothma has repeatedly claimed that she had no knowledge of Jinnron's financial difficulty. However, given these accusations, it seems more likely that she not only knew but helped cover it up. Why else would she have called that meeting early last fall with Jinn, his Ministry friends, and a trained Bantha? Was Jinn paying her to keep quiet? What was he paying her with? Is it really that hard to guess?

Check back for more on this scandal.

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